When Your Sales Process Feels Like a Bad Tinder Date…
Most high-ticket sales processes feel like the worst Tinder date you could imagine… on steroids. Awkward, one-sided, desperate. Filled with cheap gimmicks, and forced rapport building.
Your prospects aren’t idiots. They know what’s happening.
They’ve been pitched, prodded, and pushed into “close now and I’ll throw in X” so many times, they can smell commission breath before you even say hello. And it STINKS.
Even the perfect-fit prospects show up with a healthy layer of resistance.
And, sorry to be the bearers of bad news, but getting better at overcoming objections or memorizing a 27-step script isn’t helping. None of those things actually address what’s at the heart of the issue, the relational imbalance baked into sales conversations to start with. The fix is removing pressure from the equation entirely—and in doing so, making it easier for people to say yes.
We call this pressure-free selling, and it’s the fastest way to turn strangers into clients without discounts, manipulation, or “limited-time-only” theatrics.
Mindset Shift: You Don’t NEED This Sale
One of our clients had a great approach to the “state” of how he enters a sales conversation.
High-performing consultants enter every call with one simple truth in mind: we’re eating steak tonight either way.
This epitomizes what we call “leaned out” energy. Not needing the prospect’s money, or hanging our entire self-worth on their “yes.”
It’s not about false bravado or posturing. You have the ability to enter any sales encounter with a mindset of abundance.
When our calendar is full, our offer is strong, and our positioning is clear, we stop radiating that subtle “please say yes” energy that prospects can smell from a mile away.
Our only job is to help the prospect do what’s best for them. Sometimes, that’s moving forward today. Other times, it’s helping them realize they’re not ready yet. Both outcomes build trust, and trust sells more than any closing tactic ever could.
Why Sales Pressure Kills Deals
Sales pressure is the silent deal-killer. It’s the tension on the call that tells the prospect, this is about you making money, not me making progress.
Our goal is to take that perceived pressure down to near zero. That means eliminating verbal tells that we’re leading them toward a foregone conclusion, and replacing them with genuine curiosity.
When pressure disappears, conversations get real. Prospects stop fortifying and start listening. They reveal the actual reasons they’re stuck. This is how we get them into the buying pocket (more on that here).
Set the Frame – Start By Sounding Different
Most marketers are familiar with the term “pattern interrupt.” It’s leveraging the power of the unusual, out of the ordinary, contrarian, impactful or even absurd to get the attention of the market and stand out in a way that gets them to engage with your message.
But, the principle of the pattern interrupt doesn’t ONLY apply to marketing. It’s just as useful as a sales technique. Track with us for a second.
The vast majority of sales conversations follow a set structure.
The rep thanks the prospect for their time, makes small talk about dumb stuff (to disarm the prospect and build rapport), launches into an agenda for the call, starts asking questions to understand their pains and goals, and then inevitably builds up their program as the logical solution to all of the prospect’s woes.
They have been through this loop too many times. They know the beats, they know the endgame, and they know when you’re asking questions only to set up your pitch.
Our approach? Skip the charade and flip the script.
For example, start by asking, “What are YOU hoping to get out of today’s call? Feel free to get as detailed as you want.”
Then shut up and listen (sadly a lost art in the modern sales culture).
It’s a pattern interrupt. It signals that we’re here for their outcome, not your quota. And it works. Too much of the average sales convo is leading and not listening. Flipping that script is the key to changing the relationship.
The Framework for Pressure-Free Selling
Let’s outline our structure for pressure-free sales, shall we?
- The Open – No weather talk, no “thanks for taking the time.” Open with permission to jump in and make the most of the call.
- Their Outcome – Ask what they want from the call, not what you want to know. Follow the breadcrumbs they give you.
- Process Overview – Map out the steps to solve their problem. Show them the road before selling them the car.
- Pitch/Offer – Connect your offer directly to what they’ve said, keeping it short and surgical.
- Logical Next Steps – Be clear and confident about what happens now. No fake deadlines, no fast-action bribes.
Always Say Less – Even When You Could Say More
The structure is great, but here’s what actually makes this work: SHUTTING UP.
Pressure-free selling works because it’s about listening, and not performing.
We resist the urge to affirm everything with “That’s perfect!” or “Exactly!”—because that signals we’re grading their answers rather than actively listening to understand. We collect the truth without judgment and with no angle toward a sale.
When we do speak, we speak with purpose: to close a loop, clarify a point, or guide the next step. Brevity, brevity, brevity.
If you find yourself eloquently monologuing in the middle of your sales call, you’ve screwed up. Time to reset.
The less we talk, the more the prospect reveals.
Why This Approach Works
This works because it’s in line with how your prospects think. By removing pressure, we remove resistance. And when resistance disappears, so does the need for hard closes, manufactured urgency, or discounting our value.
The result? More clients, better clients, and a sales process that feels just as good to run as it does to buy from.
Want to go deeper?
If you’re wanting a deeper understanding of the sales process and how to stand out in a crowded market, you can get our definite sales manual, Winning at Sales, on Amazon for just 99¢. It’s a tactical, field-tested guide to mastering every stage of the sale without losing your soul in the process. Grab your copy today and turn every sales conversation into a win-win.
